Love Letter On Motherhood


Motherhood is creation. Making humanity is about as monstrously creative as any single human is ever going to get. And yet, the creativity inherent to motherhood is widely undervalued. Our society seldom values motherhood for the creative energy field that it is. Instead, we ask women to go back to who they were before motherhood—bikini body and all—as quickly and quietly as possible. We erase the very story of our creation.

Hear me well, dear reader. This is no crusade against a neat nip and tuck. Do what you have to do. Instead, this is a quest to tap into what your body and being intrinsically know how to do—making something alive from inanimate matter.

Take the long period of creative gestation when new ideas need embryonic nurture in the subconscious. So much of this artistic gestation mimics pregnancy. The female body does so much work carrying life to term beyond the mind’s reach, input or analysis. Basically the same thing your subconscious does with those brilliant ideas—no active input or fretting required from your thinking mind beyond feeding your subconscious soul food and good vibes. But how we love to tell the subconscious what to do. How we love to boss it into premature deliveries of half-baked ideas that just needed more faith and less anxiety.

I’m also thinking about my fear of motherhood. As an artist, all I heard in art-school and beyond was how kids ruin creative ritual and routine. I know I don’t believe that. Not deep down. But I’m not immune to periodic pangs of fear. What would happen to my writing? Where would I find the time?

This Love Letter gives me hope. Knowing BossBabes like Kate Otto Chelby, Phyllida Barlow, Shira Richter, Lila Bernard, Susan Davis and Sam L. Chang are outcheres mothering and making a brave new world fit to their highest imaginations shows me the way back home. To the living example of my mother, The Maks! God’s Supreme Being that is Dimakatso Madipisho Rebecca Mphela Makhene. My first and most enduring role model on motherhood and being a badass at every age. This woman’s living example assures me that my most beautiful artistic journey--motherhood--lies ahead.